Katherine Daniel ~ Editor-in-Chief
Relationships are never easy. You have situations where you want to cry, smile, or be angry. There are times where you want to have time away from your significant other and other times, you want them to hold you close. There are always many ups and downs to a relationship, but if you love each other, you end up making things workout in the end. I’ve been in a relationship with my man for five years now, and it has truly been a journey of plenty of laughing, crying, endless memories, and tons of love. But even in our relationship, things have never been easy. We have taken one break when we have been together, but not long after being apart, we came back together, and it seems like nothing ever happened. Since being in a long-term relationship, I have learned many key things to a successful relationship.
1.Communication is Key. Being in an argument with your significant other is never easy. These unnecessary arguments will continue to happen if there is no form of communication going on between each other. That means you and him both have to just suck it up and tell each other how you really feel, even though you do not really want to. I am definitely guilty of this and it has been a big learning experience for me to really open up because I am always afraid of more arguing or being disrespected and not listened to.
- Do not play the “blaming game”. It is hard to not blame each other when you are in a heated moment, but blaming each other will get you absolutely nowhere. It is very important to understand that you both are not fighting against each other, but you two are really fighting together against the issue at present moment. You both are on the same team, so when you blame a teammate it leads you to both losing. Instead of blaming each other for the issue at hand, play the game “what could you work on next time.”
3.Never be passive aggressive. Saying passive aggressive comments are a no, no. Saying comments like “whatever” or “just forget it” is not helpful in any conversation, so just be direct with one another when talking rather than making the sarcastic comments.
4.Be understanding. In a relationship, you must be understanding to one another. Understanding one another is important when one of you screws up or does something uncalled for. People make mistakes and it essential to understand that your significant other will also make mistakes now and again. If they continue to mess up, then maybe it is time to sit down and have a serious talk about it. Also, getting opinions from other viewers about the issue you are having helps you have a better view about the situation.
- NEVER, EVER go to bed upset. I know people need their space after a major fight, but letting the two of you go to sleep when you are mad at each other or in a bad mood is the worst way for someone to wake up in the morning. Make sure to clear up and tell each other you are sorry before going to sleep or you will end up feeling even more drained.
- Talk about everything and anything. Being in a long relationship does not mean the spark or the conversations need to go away. Every single day being together is a new chance to learn more about one another and new things happen every day with one another. Do not stop having conversations about your partner’s big or little ideas. Talking to each other about how your day went or something that happened during the day will help you. It is the little conversations where you end up learning more about each other and love each other more.
- Do not forget to show how much you appreciate them. During the days of work, school, or other activities, you can often get caught up in all of these things and forget to tell your significant other about how they truly mean to you and that you appreciate all the little things they do for you. Do not take your significant other for granted and remember to say “I love you” to each other every day. Get your girl some flowers or if you are the girl, get your guy his favorite food. Doing little things for each other, will help each one of you know that your appreciation and love for one another has never changed.
- Set aside the college work, Xbox games, or phones, and make some quality time for the two of you. It is never easy to set aside all of the things you have to do in a day, but you must make quality time for the two of you. Try not to wait at the last minute to do homework late at night because during the evenings you could spend some quality time with your significant other. I know it was hard for my man and me because we both had lots of homework and studying to do first semester, but then we had times where he would be playing his Xbox and I would be doing stuff on my computer where we could have been spending quality time together doing something.
Like I said before, and I will say it again, relationships are not easy at all. If you think it is always easy and happy, you are definitely wrong. These eight things are just a few things on my list of what I have learned while being in a long-term relationship. Take this list of eight things as a piece of advice for those who are in relationships or who are trying to start a relationship.